A Grubby Maine Day

photgraphs and text by John Ames

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I don’t like the weather today.

So far this winter we have been having lots of snow and bitterly cold temperatures and that’s OK. It’s often been hard to go outside but, it’s winter in Maine and occasionally freezing one’s ass off is the price one pays for living here. However, today is different.

For one thing it’s warm. Warm, 47 degrees to be exact, and that is warm bucko. The snow melts when it’s this warm of course and that’s a good thing. But when warm air sits on top of cold snow-covered ground, fog forms and that’s bad because that kind of fog lays waiting in what seems like almost random places. One minute you’re tooling along at 60 mph on a clear road and the next you are in pea soup fog with a visibility of, at best, 50 yards. Rear-ending someone or getting run into yourself is really easy today.

Maine license plates have the slogan “Vacationland” on them. Really?! Maybe in the summer when the waves sparkle silver on the bay or fall when the leaves of the hardwoods are brilliant red and gold.

But now?

In our dreams.

Nobody in their right mind would come up here. It’s gray, raining like hell, streams are flooding and the roadside snow is turning a grimy greasy brown. Not only that but more of the same is coming tomorrow.

Welcome to “Vacationland”.

Do yourself a favor and stay away.

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